Pain Redefined
by squeaky521
Summary: SS/HG-BDSM Themes. Hermione was reminiscing. This is where our story begins. BDSM Themes, you've been warned, and will be again.
1. Chapter 1

Pain redefined

Chapter 1

AN 1: I do not own Harry Potter or the characters therein. They are owned by JK Rowling and her subsidiaries. I make no money off this fiction. Nor do I own _Disturbed's_ song_ Pain redefined_. It is being used as inspiration for this fic, nothing more.

AN 2: This is not a song fic. I'm merely using the title as inspiration. This is an M rated fic, you have been warned. Adult eyes only! This is also going to contain BDSM themes, don't like don't read. No flames about content please, you were warned, be nice! As for the writing itself, I only have one other story posted, I'm a newbie. Constructive criticism is welcome. Flames will be used to heat my cappuccino. Thanx! Oh, POV will be both Sev and Hermione. I will use page breaks to signify who's it is. If it's confusing, let me know. I'll see what I can do.

* * *

As Hermione lay in bed next to her husband she thought about what people 'know' about her: Yes, she's intelligent, shockingly so to some, but not all. Some could call her appearance plain, but opinions are like assholes, everyone has one. She's been called bossy more than once in her life, it no longer bothers her. She's knows her true self. Hermione Snape nee' Granger is a submissive at heart. Very few people know this about her. Her husband of 5 years does, as he's also her Master.

Hermione once heard a muggle song called, '_Pain redefined_.' The title resonated with her on a deep level. Yes, she enjoys pain. Certain types of pain. But she can't call it pain, it must be called pleasure. When Severus and she play, oh, it's something else. She gets such a high from the intense physical and emotional stimulation. She know's this is called 'sub space'. She loves it there, she'd live there if she could! She's also been told that Severus can enter a high place too, it's called 'Top Space'. He's told her he's only ever gotten there with her. You see, he actually enjoys the play with her. When he was forced to do it by the Dark Lord, it sickened him. Boy, had that been hard for them to work through when Hermione told him of her interests.

* * *

Pretty soon Hermione was reminiscing about the first time she played. It really shouldn't have been a happy memory. But she decided to make it one.

* * *

She had been captured by Death Eaters, that in itself was bad enough, but then she was brought to the Dark Lord.

"Ah, the Mudblood Granger girl. How good of you to join us." A high cold voice spoke. Hermione shuddered. She knew that voice. She'd never heard it before, but Harry had described it accurately enough. _Wonderful. Say your prayers now Granger, you're a goner. _

* * *

"Severus, you know our guest do you not?"

"Yes, My Lord." Severus Snape answered calmly. However his thoughts were anything but. _No, not again! Not a student, I cannot stand it!_

"Good. I will leave you to it then. Break her. And do be quick about it, Severus." Voldemort hissed.

"I will do my best, My Lord." Snape bowed his head. _Break her...Oh Gods!_

* * *

AN: I have experience in the BDSM lifestyle. I am a submissive myself. My husband is my Sir. If this weirds you out, I'm sorry. Stop reading now. As for the rest of you, I hope you enjoy this fic. I know it's short right now, and it's a cliffie, but I've got another fic going. They are both priority. Neither one will be abandoned. My muse wants them both written now. Thanx!


	2. Chapter 2

Pain Redefined

Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, that would be JK Rowling. I'm not her. Trust me.

* * *

AN: Warning: BDSM Themes abound! You've been warned, again.

Chapter 1 was short. I'm hoping this won't be. Enjoy! Constructive criticism is welcomed. Flames will be used to heat my cappuccino.

* * *

Severus wasn't happy. _Break her. _It played over and over in his mind as he walked towards his former student. _Break her. _He knew what he had to do. _Break her. _That didn't mean he wanted to do it. _Break her. _

"Dolohov, give me the girl." He spat at the other Death Eater.

"Merlin Snape, eager aren't we?" Dolohov laughed, and pushed the bound and gagged Hermione to Snape. He caught her before she could fall.

"Bugger off." He told the man under his breath. He grabbed Hermione by the arm and half dragged her out of the room.

_Oh Gods! What did he mean 'break her.' And why Snape? _Hermione was thinking while she was being drug somewhere.

"Please Professor, I could walk easier if I could see."

"I am not your Professor!" He barked at her. She cringed.

"I'm sorry. What would you like me to call you?" She whispered.

"You will not call me anything. I will address you, and you will answer. That is all. Am I understood?"

"Yes Sir." She replied. _Help me! Anyone! Please!_

* * *

_Why did it have to be Granger? She'll never listen to me. I cannot break her. She's the most stubborn girl-woman I have ever met. _He could not deny she was a woman now. She had graduated four years before, and now worked for the Ministry. How and why they captured her, he didn't know, but he was going to find out. _Just a little further and I can explain everything to her. Thank the Gods that sadistic bastard gives me privacy. _He had made sure of that. _I just hope she listens. _When they reached the 'Break Room'-Severus did not find the name funny-he shoved her inside. She landed on her knees and somehow managed not to fall. Once he had shut the door firmly he walked over and helped her up. "I'm sorry Miss Granger." He said softly. "Are you hurt?"

"No Sir_._" She answered.

"I'm going to unbind you and remove the blindfold. Then we are going to talk. Do you understand?" She nodded. He flicked his wand and her hands and eyes came free. She looked around at where she was.

* * *

_What the hell? Oh dear Gods, no! NO! This cannot be! _Hermione was panicking. Once Snape had removed her blindfold she looked around, she wished she hadn't. This was a room of torture, it was plain to see. Every inch of the room was covered in what she knew were devices meant to cause pain. There were chains hanging from the ceiling. She could see old fashioned iron manacles attached to one wall, with something dark red, almost black still on them. _I hope that's not blood_. Along another wall were whips and riding crops. She knew those from riding horses with her parents when she was younger. On a third wall were floggers. They had short handles and there were thin pieces of leather coming out of them. And finally the fourth wall was cover in rope of every diameter and length you could ever want. _It's like something out of one of my books. _

_Hermione had been reading Muggle erotic fiction for several years. She had wandered into an erotic book store one day shortly after she graduated and was captivated. She enjoyed sex, certainly, but what they were doing in these books! It was like nothing she had ever experienced. She very much wanted to try it. It was something called BDSM, she learned. Bondage-Discipline-Sadism-Masochism. She knew she was a Masochist, when she and Ron were still together he had smacked her ass once during sex. She thought she should be angry about it, but it made her so excited, she simply couldn't. When she brought up the idea of a relationship based on S&M Ron had blanched. 'Hermione, it's one thing to smack your ass during sex, I was just playing around. I have no desire to do anything more. That's just sick.' She had dropped it then, but it wasn't too long after that she realised she loved the mix of pain and pleasure. She began begging for him to spank her before or during sex. He got angry one night and beat her with his belt. She loved it. He scared himself. A month later he had moved out of their flat. 'I just can't do it Hermione. It's wrong. I'm sorry.' And with that their relationship was over. _

"Miss Granger, we need to talk." Snape's voice broke her out of her memories. She turned to face him, and waited.

* * *

Once Granger was facing him he noticed how she was standing. She had her hands behind her back and her head bowed. _Submissive. _He found himself thinking. _No-she cannot understand already! _He thought it best to find out what she knew. "Miss Granger," He said again. "Look at me." She complied. "You seem to recognise some of the equipment in this room, tell me, what do you know of what it's used for?"

"It causes pain." She answered.

"Come now, I saw the recognition in your eyes, you know there's more to it than that." _Just tell me, get it over with. _

"It's used in the BDSM lifestyle." She whispered.

_Sweet Circe! She knows! _"Do you have experience?"

"Not as such, no."

"For pity's sake girl, elaborate!" Snape was getting frustrated now. _She never hesitated to answer every question thrown at her with what could fill two pages of parchment!_

"I've read some Muggle books on the subject. I wanted to try it, but Ron would have none of it." She answered meekly.

"So you did stay with Weasley." He sneered.

"Yes, he left almost two years ago." She told him. _She doesn't seem upset. _He told her as much. "I'm not. I've moved on. He couldn't give me what I wanted, what I needed." _Merlin help me!_

* * *

_Shit. Why am I telling him all this. He'll just use it against me. Oh no! One of them must have slipped me Veritaserum. Lovely. Just fucking lovely. Please stop asking questions! _

"How did you come to be captured?" She heard Snape ask. She found herself unable not to answer.

"I was at a small cafe in Diagon Alley, having lunch. When I left and walked around the corner I must have been hit by a Stunner, I don't remember anything after leaving the cafe until I woke up here."

"Ok, I see." He answered. _What do you see? Why am I here? What does Voldemort want from me? _She knew better than to voice these questions. He had told her not to speak unless spoken to. So she waited.

* * *

_They must have put Veritaserum in her food. _Severus thought irrelevantly. _Oh well, it doesn't matter now. She told me what I already knew. She's a submissive at heart. That could make this easier. No, it won't be easier, you fool. This is no longer your life! You do not do this for pleasure anymore. The Dark Lord took that away from you too! But if she wants it...ENOUGH! _Severus shut his thoughts off and got down to business.

"Miss Granger, you are here to be broken. I am to beat you and control you until you crack and swear allegiance to the Dark Lord." She gasped at that. "Yes. I know." He told her quietly. "However, that is not going to happen. I am going to get you out of here." _I have to. For my own sanity. _He added in his head.

* * *

AN: Ah, the plot thickens. Yes, we will get to see them play. We'll get to the romance too. It's going to take some time. I really want this story to have some action, besides BDSM. But it will be there. I promise. No more updates today, I'm afraid. I have to be up early tomorrow. Thanx for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

Pain Redefined

Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Don't own it. JK Rowling does.

AN: Sorry, forgot to tell ya'll this is obviously AU, and Severus and Hermione are going to be OOC. My fic, my rules. :) Thanx! By the way, I'm from America. You'll see American slang as well as British and Magical. Sorry if it's confusing. I can't think of a way to explain how they know American slang.

* * *

_Get me out of here? _Hermione couldn't comprehend what Snape was saying. _How does he plan to do that? Why would he do that? _She gave him a skeptical look. She didn't say anything, she knew better. _Don't anger him now! He's your only way out of here! _

_Of course she doesn't believe me. Probably still thinks I'm a loyal Death Eater. _Severus sighed internally. He knew he had some convincing to do. "Miss Granger, I can see you don't believe me. I will get you out of here. You are important to the war effort." She gaped at him. "Close your mouth. I know you don't think I'm on your side, and I frankly don't care, all I ask is that you trust me until you're out of this mess." She nodded slowly. "Good. Now, I see you're still under the impression you cannot speak. Let me assure you, I only said that because we were still being watched. This room is warded and silenced. The Dark Lord believes I prefer to 'work' alone." _Work, ha! This used to be fun. Fucking bastard. _"We are safe enough here for the time being. However he won't give me more than a few hours before he sends someone to check on my progress."

_He's allowing me to speak? That could be good or bad. How can I trust that this room is as secure as he says? You can't you fool! You already told him you would trust him. Nothing you can do now except do so. _Her mind made up, Hermione relaxed her posture and asked a question. "What do we do now?"

"First of all, I must give you some information. Draco and Mr. Potter are together. They have been for two years now. Draco is also a spy for The Order." Her shock showed on her face and made Severus smirk. "Yes, Miss Granger-"

"Hermione." She replied absently.

"Pardon me?"

"Call me Hermione. I am no longer your student as you pointed out. And what the hell do you mean Harry and Malfoy are together? They hate each other. They have since first year! And Malfoy a spy? You can't be serious!"

"Calm down!" Severus barked. "Miss Granger," She scowled at him. "Pardon me, _Hermione_, you do not know everything that goes on. You must have realised by now that Albus does not tell everyone everything. I am merely telling you this because Draco will be assisting us in your escape. I can't have you hexing him when he gets here." With that he pulled her wand out of his pocket and handed it to her. Again her face showed her surprise. "I thought you trusted me?" He asked.

"I do." She answered quietly, still staring at her wand.

"I gave you that in the event that we are caught. You will have to defend yourself if the worst happens. I am taking a great risk in helping you escape. If Draco or I is found out, we will be killed. Do you understand?" She nodded. "Good. Now for the bad news. We're going to have to make it convincing that I am doing my job and attempting to break you. We cannot leave until after nightfall. As I said before, he will send someone in to check my progress. I'm sorry, but you're going to have to let me play with you."

_He's going to play with me? Oh my. My dream come true, only not as I expected! Still, if I can trust him... _"Ok, I understand, Sir. It's fine."

"You may call me Severus." He told her quietly.

"Ok, Severus." _Mmm, I quite like that._

"Only when we're alone. When whomever gets sent in to check on us gets here, you must call me 'Sir'. You seem to know a little about the lifestyle, I'm sure you can figure it out and make it look good. Yes?"

"Yes." She answered. "I did tell you though, I've only read about it, I've never really played before." _I know. This isn't how you should be learning either. _"It's fine. I remember how serious you took studying. I'm sure you will catch on in no time. We really must begin, we only have 30 minutes at best before we're interrupted." He noticed her shiver at bit at that. "I promise, Hermione, I won't do anything to harsh. I'll try to keep this as mild as possible." He told her softly. "Come." He reached out and took her hand.

_Oh Gods! I'm really doing this! With Snape! Calm down. You'll be fine, he promised not to be harsh. This is not how I thought my first time would be. _She let him lead her over to the far wall. He picked up a pair of leather restraints and placed one on each of her wrists and ankles. Then he led her over to the chains hanging from the ceiling.

"I'm going to attach your hands to these chains. Ok?" He asked her.

"Yes." She answered softly. _Now is not the time to get excited you idiot! You're in danger! _She told herself firmly.

"Ok, Hermione." He said once she was bound. "I'm going to blindfold you, then we'll get started." She nodded. _Oh Gods! I'm practically dripping! I hope he can't smell it. _Once he had the blindfold on he spoke again. "I'm afraid I will have to leave some marks. They won't be permanent, I promise. But they could very well save your life, as well as mine." She nodded again. That was all she could bring herself to do. She knew she was already entering 'subspace'. She had read about it, but never been there. She was feeling surprisingly calm and content, considering where she was and whom she was with. _Not good. _She thought slowly. Then she felt the first blow of the flogger on her back, and she was gone.

_ She's awfully quiet again. For the love of all that is holy! She's already in subspace isn't she? Lovely. Just what I need. _He knew the signs of subspace from prior experience when he was a Top for pleasure. He found himself being pleased with having put her there with one blow, but knew he couldn't afford to be. _Now is not the time or place! _He told himself forcefully. _Just make it look good Severus. Do not enjoy it!_ He continued flogging her robotically. His shields were up, he knew he couldn't endure it otherwise.

Hermione was being flogged by her former Professor, and she was in Voldemort's lair. She couldn't have cared less. She was floating. That was the only way to describe it. Oh, she felt each blow of the flogger, there was no mistaking the feel of it now, and it was wonderful. She felt herself sag, her wrists and shoulders taking her full weight as she fell deeper into pleasured pain.

_ Foolish girl. You're going to be even more sore tomorrow if you keep that up. _"Miss Granger!" Severus barked. She jerked in response, but that was it. _Fuck, she's gone. Better get her down. _Severus began lowering the chain from the ceiling slowly. Once Hermione was on the floor he untied her. He lifted her from the floor, she was completely limp, but she did rouse enough to wrap her arms around his neck as he carried her to the bed in the corner. Severus lay her down gently and covered her with the quilt. _He'll be sending someone any minute. Gods help us. I hope this works. _Severus had a plan, not a very good one he admitted to himself, but a plan nonetheless. However, it didn't involve Miss Granger turning into a pile of goo. _I could work this to my advantage. _Severus mused. He sat himself in the chair beside the bed and waited. A few minutes later there was a knock at the door. "Enter." He said. Once the Death Eater entered the room and saw that Hermione was laying seemingly unconscious on the bed he smirked at Severus and took his leave once more. Severus released the breath he hadn't known he was holding. _Thank goodness for small favors! Now, we need to get out of here. _He knew he had to get a hold of Draco somehow, but he wasn't permitted to leave the 'Break Room' until his job was complete. 'Complete' meaning, either the victim was broken or dead. He had broken many in the course of the last decade or so. He had never killed one. At least not with a beating. If they were too strong willed to be broken, he killed them quickly and painlessly. He wasn't a monster. _I'm NOT a monster! _He had to remind himself of that fact often. _Ok, focus! Draco. _The Dark Lord had spoken of training the boy to help when Severus was unavailable. _That's going to have to do. _Severus sighed, then called the resident house-elf.

"Master summoned Tarken?"

"Yes, I need for you to fetch Draco. If The Dark Lord asks, tell him it is under my orders that you do so."

"Yes Master." Tarken bowed and disapparated. While Severus waited for Draco he decided it was time to wake Hermione and explain his plan.

AN: I know evil cliffie! I know, they didn't play much, and it wasn't terribly descriptive, sorry. This story is giving me a serious headache! I'll hopefully be past the writers block soon!


	4. Chapter 4

Pain Redefined

Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, JK Rowling does. I don't make any money off this work of fiction.

AN: I'm back. Had to wait for inspiration to strike. Now onto the plan...

* * *

Hermione was drifting in and out of conciousness. She thought she heard someone calling her name, but she simply didn't care. She was quite happy to stay where she was, thank you very much.

"Miss Granger!" _What? Who? _Hermione thought, slowly coming awake at last.

Severus could tell when reality dawned on Hermione. Her eyes widened, she sat bolt upright and looked around frantically. _Here we go._

"Hermione, calm down, you're safe for the moment, but we must talk, Draco will be in shortly." He told her. She merely nodded and looked about to pass out again, he quickly grabbed her arm and prevented her from laying back down. "No, you must stay alert." He told her firmly.

"I'm sorry Sir, but I'm so tired." She mumbled. He didn't miss that she had called him 'Sir' again. _No matter. Better get her awoken better though. _Severus released her arm and walked over to a cabinet on the wall, he opened it and picked up a vial of potion. Taking it back to the bed, he handed it to Hermione. "Drink this, it will help." She took it and drank. _She really must be out of it. That or she trusts me as much as she says she does. _

"What was that?" She asked, clearly much more aware now.

"It was a potion I came up with years ago. It doesn't even have a name. It simply pulls a person out of subspace. It's based on the Alertness Potion, but modified. No matter, we must talk." He told her quickly. "Draco will, with any luck, be here in a few minutes. When he gets here I will explain the plan. You must follow our every direction. Is that clear?" He finished.

"Yes." She said simply.

Hermione's mind was racing. _Draco and Harry are a couple, Draco is a spy, I just played for the first time ever, with my former Potions Professor no less, and what the hell is this potion doing to me? _She distantly heard Severus tell her she had to follow their directions. She answered absently. Too wrapped up in her own mind to care one way or the other. She found herself thinking very clearly. And rapidly. It was disconcerting to say the least. _What was in that stuff?_ She mused.

_"Hermione? Wake up girl!" _

"Huh?" She looked up and saw Severus staring at her.

Severus pinched the bridge of his nose, frustrated. "Welcome back." He bit out. "You have to stay with me. I know the potion is making your mind race. It will pass in a few minutes. Sooner if you make the effort to focus on something else." He told her.

"Yes Sir." She said.

"And stop calling me 'Sir'." He snapped.

"Well I'm sorry, _Severus, _after seven years of calling you that, it is a hard habit to break." She snapped right back. _That's it, focus on your anger, your mind will clear. _He willed her silently.

"Further more, what's this 'plan' you're talking about. How the hell do you expect to get out of here?" She ranted.

"I will explain that when Draco gets here. I do not like to repeat myself." He said through gritted teeth. _She sure can focus like no one I've ever met. _He grumbled to himself. Just then there was a sharp knock on the door.

"Enter." Severus called. To his immense relief it was Draco who came in. "Draco." He greeted.

"Severus."

"You remember Miss Granger?"

"Hermione." She snapped.

"Yes, I remember her. Bossy as ever I see." Draco smirked.

"Why you little-"

"Enough, both of you. In case you've forgotten," he looked at Hermione, "you're in danger." He looked at Draco, "and you are here to help, not rile her up." They both nodded. "Good, now listen up." And with that Severus launched into lecture mode. "I have worked on a potion for several years with little success. Luckily for us in the past few months progress has been steady. It is ready."

"What does it do?" Hermione asked warily. Clearly unsure about taking another potion without asking first. _Good girl. _

"It is another modified potion. This one is an altered version of the Draught of Peace."

Hermione's over-active mind kicked into gear and she gasped. _Oh, I don't like where this is going. _"You mean to tell me, you expect me to play dead?" She asked Severus.

"For all intents and purposes you will be dead, Hermione." He replied. _I really don't like this. _

Severus could tell Hermione wasn't thrilled with the idea. _You'll like this even less I fear. _"Yes, it will put you in a very deep sleep. You will appear to be dead. Even a trained Mediwizard would be fooled. However, this cannot happen for at least another day. There is no way the Dark Lord would believe I killed you already." She gasped. "I'm sorry Hermione, you will be a captive for a while longer." He turned his attention to Draco now. "Did you tell him you were coming to assist me?"

"Yes, he was most pleased to hear that." Draco replied, rolling his eyes.

"Good. Then you should be safe to stay for a while. I need your help with the potion. I am going to be busy on and off over the next couple of hours, and it needs attending to. I've left the instructions in the lab." He dismissed Draco, then regarded Hermione. We're going to have to play at least once more." He saw her eyes light up a bit. "However, you mustn't go under. The Dark Lord will be sending someone in to check on my progress again. You must fight me while they are here. I need a plausible excuse to 'kill you'." She nodded her understanding, stood and approached him. _Not now. I cannot deal with this now. _He evaded her by turning sharply and walking away. "I will be back shortly, you may rest until then." He called out over his shoulder.

_Well that was weird._ Hermione mused. Shrugging her shoulder's at no one in particular, she decided to explore the room a bit more. _This is the dungeon of my dreams!_ She had been terrified on her first scan of the room, now she walked over to the wall with the manacles to get a closer look. _Please don't be blood. _She inspected them closely, then used her wand to verify her guess. _Thank Merlin! _It was just a potion, obviously for Voldemort's benefit. Her inspection of the manacles complete she noticed there was a table set up nearby. On it were an assortment of leather cuffs. She reached out picked one up and brought it to her nose. She inhaled deeply, and moaned. "I love that smell." She jumped when she realised she had spoken out loud, but when she turned around there was no one about. _Whew, I've got to be more careful. _She set the cuff back on the table exactly where it had been. _Time to move on I think. _She walked to the next wall and paused drinking in the sight of so many whips and crops. _If I wasn't about to 'die' this could be a very interesting situation! _Once she had looked her fill at the items in front of her she moved on. The next wall held the floggers. She ran her fingers through the various tassels, leaned in and inhaled again. _Mmmm. _She decided to skip the rope wall. _It's just rope, pretty colors, but rope just the same. _She moved into the middle of the room to look at the chains that hung from the ceiling. She had no idea someone was watching her, but watch he did.

* * *

AN: I know it's kinda short. It felt like a good place to stop. Sorry for the long wait, RL got in the way. Pesky bother that it is! Hope you enjoyed. Reviews are love!


	5. Chapter 5

**Pain Redefined **

**Chapter 5**

AN: Sorry about the wait. My muse is tired apparently. Warning: BDSM Themes.

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters. JK Rowling does. I am making no money off this work of fiction.

* * *

Severus stood just inside the door to the dungeon, he had been about to talk to Hermione when she moaned and spoke. "Ohh, I love that smell." She jerked around, realising she spoke out loud but thankfully didn't see him standing there. He watched her progress around the room. She stopped at the whips and crops, he could see the longing in her eyes. _How I wish..._ He stopped that thought in its tracks. _Not now, Snape. You have to get her out of here. _Severus decided it was time to start that process. He waited till she was in the middle of the room eyeing the chains that hung from the ceiling before he approached. "Hermione." He said softly. She still jumped.

She rounded on him, "Merlin, Severus! You scared the hell out of me!"

"It's time." He replied.

Hermione froze. _It's time? Oh Gods! You're fine! Keep calm, stay aware! _She told herself firmly. After taking a few deep breaths she nodded and said, "I'm ready." Severus nodded in return the closed the distance between them.

"I'm going to tie you again." He told her. "I will have to make them tight enough that you won't break free when you struggle. They won't hurt, they'll just be snug."

"Ok, I trust you." She told him.

_I know you do. I just hope I can keep my promise. _Severus thought to himself. He walked over to the table and picked up the leather cuffs. _She likes these. Woah! Where'd that come from? Enough! Do your job, play your part. _He chastised himself. When he returned to Hermione with the cuffs she gave him a small smile and held out her hands. _So eager to please. _He willed his less than healthy thoughts away and cuffed Hermione's wrists. "You must not go under." He reminded her. "You should still have enough of the anti-subspace potion in your system to maintain awareness." She nodded. He continued, "I'm going to attach you to the table this time, it will be safer when you start struggling." He led her over to the far side of the room to a table with various anchor points. He laid her down gently on her stomach, walked over to the rope wall and picked up a black bundle. Walking back to the table he noticed Hermione's eyes were half lidded. "Hermione, you mustn't get comfortable." He snapped. She jumped a little at his harsh tone.

"Sorry." She mumbled.

"It will be easier for you if you just don't think about it." He told her. "Just fight me as much as you can. Concentrate on that, and the fact it is your only chance of getting out of here alive."

"Ok." She said simply. He nodded, sensing that she now understood the gravity of the situation.

"I'm going to tie you down now. As I said it will be snug. I'll do my best not to hurt you too much." He finished tying her then steeled himself for what he had to say next. _I'm so sorry._ "I'm going to have to leave marks, Hermione. This has to be believable. The Dark Lord won't let me kill you unless I prove I've tried my best to break you. You must hold on."

"I'm ready." She said. And with that Severus walked to the wall and chose his toy.

_Oh Gods. That thing is huge. _Hermione was scared now. The flogger Severus had chosen looked like it could flay her skin from the bones. She judged the tassels to be about 2 feet long, 1/2 an inch wide. He must have seen something in her eyes, because when he returned to her side he spoke. "Do not worry. I won't leave permanent marks." She found herself nodding, not trusting her voice. He continued, "Remember not to go under. When I say you must fight me. Scream and struggle. Do you understand?"

"Yes." She replied. _That shouldn't be a problem! That thing's wicked looking. Ok Hermione, remember to stay alert. _She told herself firmly. She yelped when he began, more out of surprise than pain. He wasn't flogging her all that hard at this point, but the flogger felt heavy against her skin. _Hmm, thuddy. He'll leave bruises, I'm sure. _She didn't try to keep track time, she just thought as hard as she could, _don't go under, don't go under._

Severus decided to start lightly at first. She was a beginner after all. She cried out at the first impact. _That's a good girl. Don't hold back. The sooner I can stop the better._ He knew this particular flogger wouldn't take long to leave nice bruises. It had been one of his favorites in his past. Nice and thuddy, leaves nice marks. He didn't use it all that often before, for just that reason. It wore the submissive out much too quickly. However it was the perfect tool for the job he was doing now. _Focus! She's awfully quiet. Sigh, time to step it up a bit. _He started swinging in a diagonal pattern, over one shoulder, down, over the other shoulder, down. Once he found his rhythm he began swinging harder. Hermione was starting to squirm a bit now. _I'm testing her limits now. Forgive me. _He kept at for another few minutes, then she started to gasp at each impact. He thought he may have heard a giggle at one point. He smiled to himself a bit at that. Severus could see the skin on the backs of her thighs clear up to her shoulder blades was a delicious shade of red now. _Delicious? No, I mustn't think like that. Not yet._ His traitorous mind added. Shaking off his less than helpful thoughts he completed his flogging with a flourish.

Hermione was having trouble. It 'hurt so good' as the muggle song once said. She was fighting the urge to succumb to subspace and just _feel._ She felt the rhythm change first, that shocked her out of her stupor a bit. Almost at the same time the impact grew harder. She wanted to ask him to stop, but at the same time she didn't. Little gasps escaped her lips of their own accord. _Well that's one way of keeping me on my toes._ She thought irrelevantly. Still she was very much enjoying herself. _But not too much, must stay here and now. You're in danger, you could die tonight. _She thought to herself. _Although, what a way to go! _She couldn't help a faint giggle at that thought. Luckily, Severus seemed not to have noticed. At least he gave no sign he did. _Good, he'll think I've gone round the bend! _She almost laughed again, but was able to suppress it with a gasp at the last moment. Mostly, she realised, because Severus had stopped flogging her. _Is that my cue? _She started squirming and whimpering, partly out of longing for him to continue, partly for the benefit of whomever might be watching.

Severus had walked to the wall to hang the flogger when he heard her whimper. _I hope she's ok. _He hurried back to her side to see her squirming against the bonds. "Are you ok?" He whispered.

"Y-yes." She stuttered.

"What's wrong?" He asked, concerned. _Did I go to far? Is she losing circulation? _He reached over and grabbed her hand to check the temperature. It was still reasonably warm. No worries there then.

"Why did you stop?" She asked quietly. He almost laughed out loud at the longing in her voice. _Gods how I miss a willing submissive. Damn the Dark Lord to the deepest pits of hell again!_

"Just getting another toy." He finally explained, walking back to the wall to get said toy and collect his wits again. He barely heard her quiet breath of "Oh, ok." She sounded relieved. _I've created a monster. If we get out of here alive, maybe..._ He stopped that thought dead, and grabbed a crop. He made his way back to Hermione. He couldn't bring himself to look at her face. He knew it would bring thoughts and longing he could ill afford right now. Severus began to beat her with the crop, _swish, crack, ah!_ Over and over again. He could feel his arousal, he could smell hers. Luckily for him at that moment he was interrupted by another Death Eater. He heard the lock slide open. "Now, Hermione." He whispered to her, continuing with the crop. She was already fidgeting a bit, but he needed her to struggle and curse him. She began writhing against the bonds and screaming at him.

"You'll never break me you bastard. I don't care what you do to me! Kill me now, it doesn't matter, we will still win!" On and on she ranted. _Damn she's good! Probably been wanting to say these things for years. _Her epithets were interrupted.

"Our Master wishes to know how you are faring with the Mudblood." The Death Eater snickered. "I can see it's not going well. I will inform him immediately." With that he left.

"Alright, Hermione, I'm going to give you the potion now. The Dark Lord will doubtless come to see for himself how I'm doing." Severus told her.

Hermione managed to nod. Severus didn't wait for more of a response he swept from the dungeon to retrieve the potion. _Ok, this is it. Stay calm. Everything is going to be fine. Severus said he perfected the potion. I trust him. _Being unable to move, Hermione just lay there and tried not to think about what was to happen now.

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AN: Again, sorry about the delay. I was having trouble with this chapter. RL got in the way. Hope you enjoyed. I should update sooner next time. No promises!


	6. Chapter 6

**Pain Redefined**

**Chapter 6**

**Disclaimer: **I don't own these characters. JK Rowling does. I make no money off this work of fiction.

**AN: **If any of you read or reviewed my other story 'Changes', it was removed. I got sick of hearing I'm a deviant, I'm sick, ect. Sorry. I put it back up, so please continue to enjoy it. As for this story, so far so good. I do have in the description that there are BDSM themes in this story, you've been warned, please no flames.

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When Severus returned with the potion he explained to Hermione what would happen. "It will take 15 minutes to work, that should give us enough time for the Dark Lord to get here, see you're not going to break and leave. He will expect me to present your body to him." He told her quietly.

"What will you have to do with me after?" She asked him, equally quietly.

He didn't want to tell her what The Dark Lord usually did with his victims. She didn't need to know they got fed to Nagini. _Thank the Gods I have a plan. I just hope it works. _

"I will request he let me take your body to Potter."

"Request? What do you mean? What if he doesn't agree, what then?" Hermoine was getting hysterical.

"He will agree. His sense of poetic justice will see to it." _If not, you'll feel no pain anyway. I'm so sorry._

She took a few deep breaths and seemed to calm down. "Ok, lets get this over with."

Hermione wasn't at all certain of what would happen next. There was something Severus wasn't telling her. That much was obvious. _I have to trust him. I have no choice. _He untied her and she sat up. Glad for the movement. Severus handed her the potion and she drank it straight down. Surprisingly, it didn't taste awful. It was a bit bitter, but not unbearable. _Well that's something, at least I won't die with a bad taste in my mouth. Ha! Ok, time to calm down, I'm getting morbid. _Hermione shook her head to clear it and lay back down. She was already getting drowsy.

"I'm going to tie you back down, Hermione." Severus told her.

"Ok." She whispered.

"Hermione, listen to me, I know you're tired, but you must fight me when the Dark Lord gets here. He has to have a reason to let me kill you. Please, Hermione, listen to me. _Oh no. I hope I didn't give it to her too soon. _

"Ok." She said again. A little stronger this time. She seemed to be fighting the drowsiness. _Good. Come on you bastard, you're in a hurry any other time to check up on me!_ It wasn't five minutes later that Severus heard the door unlock and the bastard himself walked in. Hermione immediately began struggling and swearing again.

"Severus, it seems Potter's little Mudblood is being a handful." Voldemort commented.  
"You bastard, Harry will kill you! You'll never get away with this! He will hunt you down and kill you! As soon as he finds out what you did to me, you'll be dead, all of you!" Hermione screamed.

"Yes, My Lord, she is that." Severus bowed and spoke.

"Have you gained anything useful from her?" Voldemort asked.

"No, My Lord. I don't believe I can break this one. She is prepared to die before giving up Potter." _Please, tell me to kill her. Quickly._

"Very well." Voldemort sighed. "Kill her."

"Yes, My Lord." Severus bowed again, and Voldemort left. _Thank the Gods! _"Ok Hermione, he's gone. The potion will take complete effect shortly. I'll take you to him then we will get you out of here." When she didn't answer he turned around and saw that her eyes were closed and her breathing was shallow. _Well then. I'm talking to myself. _

Hermione was drifting. She felt very peaceful. She thought she heard Severus say something, but she was too tired to care. _Dying isn't so bad. _That was her last thought before everything went black.

She woke what felt like a few minutes later to find herself on a bed in a strange room. _Where the hell am I? _She tried to sit up but her body felt very heavy.

"Don't try to move just yet, the potion will take some time to completely wear off." She heard a voice say. _Potion? _She thought, then everything came flooding back. _Oh Gods!_ She started crying. _I'm alive! Amen, I'm alive! Harry and Draco are a couple. My ex-potions Professor is into BDSM! My life cannot get any more screwed up! _Then she was laughing and crying at the same time.

_What the hell? _Severus thought. "Hermione? Are you ok?" She didn't seem able to answer. _Uh oh. _"Hermione, I'll be right back." He told her. _Time to find Potter. He has some explaining to do. _Severus had no idea how to deal with a hysterical young woman. She seemed to have finally realised what happened over the last couple of days. _Why me? Why is it always me?_ Severus thought to himself ruefully as he ran to the floo. He threw some powder in the fireplace, knelt down and stuck his head in the green flames. "12 Grimmauld Place, Potter, you there?"

"Yes, Snape, I'm here. How's Hermione?" Harry's voice answered. _Thank God! _

"She's less than well, Potter. You need to come here, now. I suggest you bring Draco."  
"Oh dear. We'll be right there."

Severus closed the floo connection. A few minutes later he heard the crack of apparition outside his house. He lowered the wards on the front door and let the two men inside. "She's upstairs." He told them. Once they were gone he sat down in his armchair and waited. _3-2-1_ "HARRY POTTER! YOU COULD HAVE TOLD ME!" _Ah there it is. I almost feel sorry for him. Almost._

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AN: I know it's short. Sorry. I'm going to start working on my stories more often now that I'm home from vacation. Next Chapter, poor Harry and Draco. Tee hee.


	7. Chapter 7

Pain Redefined

Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: Don't own 'em, never did, never will. Don't sue.**

**AN: On we go! Hermione gets her knickers in a twist! Enjoy!**

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"HARRY POTTER! YOU COULD HAVE TOLD ME!" Hermione screamed. Inwardly grinning at her friend's look of fear.

"Now wait a minute, 'Mione..." Harry started.

"Don't you ''Mione' me! Draco Malfoy? You're gay? Snape's actually still on our side? Any of this ring a bell?!" Hermione knew she was shouting for the whole house to hear, whomever may be there, but she simply didn't care. "I am supposed to be one of your best friends! We're in this war together, we're fighting for the same thing! What the hell?"

"Listen, Hermione. I was going to tell you. I swear!" He added at her look of obvoius disbelief. She took a breath to yell at him some more, but he forestalled her, "Hermione, please, stop shouting and listen." She let out the breath slowly, her anger fading a bit.

"Alright, alright, I'm listening. I'm warning you though, this had better be good, or you're in for one hell of a hex!"

"Ok, so Draco and I have been dating for around 2 years. We actually met at a gay bar in Muggle London. I almost drew my wand and hexed him when I saw him! But, oh Hermione, he was so sexy in his red leather pants and black tee." Hermione almost laughed despite herself. Harry sounded like he was going to swoon any minute. She was still angry with him though for not telling her this 2 years ago.

"Yes, that's all well and good, Harry, but, MOVING ON!"

"Sorry. Ahem, yes. So anyway, we got to talking and I found out that Snape was still working for the Order. Apparently he and Dumbldore had planned his death before hand. I didn't believe it at first but, then Draco told me he was working for the Order too. Let me tell you that was shocking! I don't think I'd have believed any of it, but, Draco was in Muggle London. In a gay bar. He's a pure-blood snob, right?" Hermione nodded. "Yeah, that's what I thought too, but turns out, his father wasn't too happy about him being gay and turned him out on his ass. He'd been looking for a way out for a long time, so he went straight to Hogwarts and told Minerva he wanted to change sides. She brought Snape in to verify his story and, well, the rest is history." Harry fell silent after this rather long-winded explanation, but Hermione wasn't done with him yet.

"Ok, I can see that being plausible, but you have conveniently skirted around the answer to my question. Why. Didn't. You. TELL ME?" She was shouting again. She didn't care.

"I didn't know how you would react to my being gay! I was scared of losing you Hermione!" Harry was shouting now too. "Ron didn't speak to me for two weeks after I told him in 7th year. I was going to tell you at the same time but after his reaction, I didn't dare!"

"Harry, I'm-" Hermione started. But Harry wasn't finished.

"I couldn't tell you about Draco and Snape because it would have led to awkward questions!" Harry was red in the face and breathing heavy by this point. Hermione felt bad now. She understood where he was coming from. Coming out about her interests in BDSM to Ron had been difficult. She hadn't told anyone else either.

"Harry, I'm sorry. I understand now. I really do. Don't worry, I'm perfectly fine with you being gay. You are still one of my best friends, I just wish you would have told me sooner."

"I'm sorry too, Hermione. I know I should have told you everything a long time ago. No more secrets, I promise." Harry hugged her then. She almost started crying. _No more secrets, easy for you to say._

Severus was relieved that the shouting had finally stopped. He had a headache as it was. He and Hermione had some serious talking to do at some point in the near future. _Best let her get over the shock of the past few days first. _His musing was interrupted by the arrival of his Godson. _Great, I wonder if she'll start on Draco next. Best head that off before it starts. _"Hello Draco." Severus greeted him.

"Hello Severus. Where's Harry?"

"Currently being chewed out by his friend, I suggest you do not go up there yet. The shouting has only just now stopped." Severus replied. Draco chuckled. _Brat. Maybe I should send him up there anyway. _Severus thought darkly.

"Listen Severus, there's an Order meeting at 8 o'clock tonight. Are we bringing Hermione? They're going to bombard us with questions at best, at worst they'll storm the house."

"You're right, dammit. I guess we'll have to take her with us. No one needs to know where this house is that doesn't already. Very well, go extricate your boyfriend so I can talk to her." Severus dismissed him.

Harry was filling Hermione in on everything that had happened with Snape, Draco and himself when there was a knock at the door. "Come in." Hermione called. Draco peered cautiously around the door seemingly waiting for a hex. "Come in Draco, I'm done yelling." She told him.

"How are you feeling?" Draco asked, walking over to sit next to Harry on the edge of the bed.

"I'm fine, thank you. Harry was just filling me in on what I've missed out on the past 2 years."

"Good. Were you done, Honey?" He asked Harry. Harry promptly blushed scarlet at the endearment.

"Yes. I think I've told her all the basics." He answered.

"Well, Severus wants us to come downstairs so he can talk to Hermione." Draco told him. Harry turned to his friend.

"Is that ok, Hermione? We can stay if you like." Hermione shook her head.

"No, it's fine." _You are not staying for this conversation. I'm sorry Harry, I'm just not ready to tell you this yet._

"Ok, we'll leave you to it then."

"Thank you." Harry and Draco left. A few minutes later another knock sounded on the door.

Severus knocked on the door to the room Hermione was now occupying. _Here goes nothing. _At her quiet, "Come in" he entered.

"Good afternoon, how are you feeling?" He asked her.

"I'm fine, thank you. What did you want to talk to me about?" _Straight to it then. Very well. _

"There's an Order meeting tonight, if you feel up to it you should attend. I'm sure everyone is worried about you."

"Ok, I feel fine. I'd like to go. You and I are going to have to talk about _things_ soon though." She told him.

_So much for stalling. _"We will, Hermione. However, you need more rest. The potion hasn't completely left your system yet. Stay in bed a few more hours, then we'll go to the meeting. After that, we will talk."

"OK, I do feel tired still. Thank you. For everything." She told him quietly.

"You're welcome." He answered. Then he left to let her get some rest.

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AN: Thanx for your lovely reviews. Next chappy, Order meeting.


	8. Chapter 8

**Pain Redefined **

**Chapter 8**

_Disclaimer: Don't own them, never did. Please don't sue._

_AN: Ok, BDSM themes, don't like don't read. In this chapter we have an Order meeting, poor Hermione is in the spotlight._

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When Hermione awoke she was somewhat disoriented. _What the hell, where am I? _Then she remembered. _Oh yeah, I haven't been told yet! _She climbed out of the bed and went in search of Severus. She found him in the kitchen. On the way she had looked around a bit. The house was nice enough, and she was wondering who's it was.

"Severus?" He looked up from his paper with a raised eyebrow.

"Good evening, how are you feeling?" _Irritated! Confused!_

"I'm ok, but, where the hell am I?" She asked.

"You are in my home. I thought it best to bring you somewhere safe while you recovered."

"Safe? Doesn't _he_ know where you live?"

"I have more than one residence, this one is unplottable and hidden with a Fidelius Charm. Draco is the secret keeper."

"Oh." _Way to sound intelligent Hermione!_

"Quite." Snape answered. "Come in and have a seat, you must be hungry." Until he had said so she hadn't realised how hungry she was. She took a seat at the table. "Holly!" Severus called. There was a _crack_ and a small house elf appeared. "Holly, this is Hermione, she's going to need clothing and something to eat."

"Yes, Master Severus."

"Thank you Holly." With that she disappeared again. A few seconds later food appeared on a plate in front of Hermione. _Well, he's nice to house-elves anyway._ Hermione found herself thinking as she ate. Once she finished her meal, Hermione went straight back to the questions.

"So..." _There I go again! Say something intelligible for a change girl!_ "So, there's an Order meeting tonight?" She asked finally. Severus looked up from his perusal of a book to answer her.

"Yes, it was called due to your capture and subsequent release." _Great! I'll have to answer a barrage of questions that I don't have answers for! I don't know who took me, I can't tell them how I was rescued. Well, at least not the truth. Hmm._

"What do they know?" She asked bluntly.

"Just what I've told them." He answered without looking up. _Ugh! What an infuriating man!_

"And what did you tell them?" She asked through gritted teeth. _Did he just smirk? Ohh, I'm going to kill him!_

"Don't worry, all they were told was that you were rescued. I informed them that the details were unimportant." _Well that's something. Although that's not going to stop the unanswerable questions. Sigh._ "Thank you." She told him, again not being able to come up with anything else. Severus for his part didn't seem to mind her less than articulate answers.

"If you've finished eating, I'm sure Holly laid something out for you to wear." He broke the silence. Hermione hadn't realised she ate anything, she certainly didn't taste it. She was too caught up in her own thoughts and worries.

"Yes, thank you." She said again. _What am I going to tell everyone? When are Severus and I going to get a chance to talk? Why does this have to be so awkward? We just spent a lovely, if terrifying, evening playing together. We should be long past awkward by now, but I can't seem to even form a full sentence around the man! _

As her thoughts and questions swirled through her head, Hermione went back to the bedroom she had occupied the previous night and found a set of plain black robes laid on the bed for her. _Hmm, black, why am I not surprised._ She giggled to herself. _I wonder if I have time for a shower. As this meeting has been called due to me, I guess I have time for whatever I want. _She found the bathroom through one of the doors in the bedroom and quickly stripped out of her dirty work robes. She looked over her body in the mirror noticing the slight bruises on her back and buttocks with relish. _He did say he would have to leave marks. _Shrugging her shoulders at herself for her silly thoughts she stepped into the shower. The hot water felt wonderful. She didn't realise that she was stiff until the knots began to loosen. _Well, from what I've read this is normal. _As she was washing her hair she started to reminisce about her session with Severus. _He picked up the flogger and walked back over to her. Mmm. _Her left had had traveled to her breast and was massaging it and pinching the nipple while her right was working it's way down in between her legs. The shampoo had made her skin slippery. Once she reached her pussy she found that she was hot and wet already. Hermione plunged two fingers roughly into her slit and with the heel of her hand began rubbing her clit. She propped one of her legs up on the side of the bathtub to give herself more room. With one hand massaging her breasts and the other firmly in her dripping core she didn't take but a few seconds to come. "Oh Severus!" She almost screamed. Once she came out of her orgasm induced haze she realised she had spoked out loud. She felt the blush creep up her face and thanked the Gods that she was on the second floor behind several doors. _I really hope he didn't hear that. _

With her shower finished, she returned to the kitchen to find that Severus was no longer there. "Severus?" She called out.

"In here, Hermione." She heard his voice call from the front room. Arriving in the sitting room Hermione was unsurprised to find Severus still reading the book that had so occupied him in the kitchen. "Um, when were we supposed to leave?" She asked, fighting the blush when he quirked an eyebrow at her and said, "We were supposed to be there 15 minutes ago, but you took longer than I expected to shower and dress." At the word 'shower' she lost the fight with her blush.

"Sorry." She said, lowering her eyes. _I cannot look at him right now! He knows, I know he knows! Oh Gods!_ A moment later, she felt a finger under her chin lifting her head to look at him.

"Don't worry about it. They will wait, they know you've been thorough a lot, they'll understand your needing to prepare." Severus told her softly. Before turning to the floo and grabbing powder. "Are you ready then?" He asked. She simply nodded, not trusting her voice. He threw the powder in the fireplace, the flames turned green and he turned to her with his hand outstretched. She grasped it and they entered the fire together. "One more thing, Hermione." Severus said. She looked up at him. "Do watch your reactions to me around the rest of the Order. They don't need to know about certain things." She felt herself blush again, but refused to look down this time.

"Alright." Was all she said.

"12 Grimmauld Place!" Severus called out their destination.

It was chaos for a good half and hour after they arrived. _Poor Hermione. _Severus could tell she was having a hard time. As soon as the hugs and -I'm so sorry's- were done the questions started.

"Hermione, sweetheart what happened, are you alright?"

"Hermione, what the hell?"

"Hermione, who took you?"

"Hermione, what did they look like."

"ENOUGH!" Severus yelled. _She is going to crack any minute._

Everyone jumped and looked at him questioning or irate, depending on who it was. "Bloody fucking hell, what is wrong with you people? Give the girl room to breathe."

Hermione for her part gave him a grateful glance once everyone stepped back a bit. She took a few deep breaths and calmed herself visibly. Then she addressed the room at large.

"I don't remember who took me. I woke up in Voldemort's headquarters. Severus managed to get me out alive. That's all that matters." She turned, walked to the table, and took a seat. Head in her hands she began to sob. Severus wanted to hold her, to take away her pain, but he knew he couldn't, not yet.

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_AN: More Order meeting next time. Hope to be quicker with the update. I have some ideas already._


	9. Chapter 9

**Pain Redefined**

**Chapter 9**

AN:

Dislaimer: Don't own them, never did. Please don't sue.

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She couldn't help herself, she didn't want to be weak, but she couldn't hold back the tears. It was all so overwhelming. She hadn't had a chance to come up with a convincing story to tell the Order about her ordeal, so she blurted the bare facts. Yet, they still wouldn't leave her alone. Molly had always been like a second mother to Hermione, but she just couldn't stand her over-protective streak right now.

"Hermione honey, you need to rest and have some dinner. Let me fix you something then we'll get you upstairs and into a nice warm bed."

"Thank you Molly, but I'm f-fine." Hermione sniffed.

"Nonsense, you're clearly upset and I'm sure that you need-", Molly started to say. Hermione lifted her tear stained face and looked at her adopted mother, but felt nothing but anger in that moment, so she interrupted.

"No, Molly. You don't know what I need right now. None of you do." She looked around at the assembled members of the Order, her family. "If you'll excuse me." She got up and headed up the stairs to the room she always stayed in as a student. _Why can't they leave me be? _As soon as she was behind the closed door she slid down to the floor and started sobbing again.

Severus was angry and concerned in equal measure. Hermione was having a terrible time dealing with everything that happened. These people, her so-called friends, were not making things any easier.

"Well, she just needs time. I'll check on her in a little while." Molly said.

"No, you won't." Severus stated, glaring at everyone. "You will all leave her alone, let her deal with this on her own. If she wants company she will come down here and seek it." He swept out of the room, intent on his own bedroom. Luckily for him his bedroom was beside Hermione's. He pointed his wand at the wall they shared and non-verbally turned it transparent. He could now see that she was seated on the floor leaning against her door with her head in her hands. He could tell she was still crying, by the way her small frame shook. She didn't know he was watching, this charm worked like 2 way glass, he could see in, she couldn't see out. It was better that way. He was sure she shouldn't be left alone, but he couldn't see any way to help her at the moment. Not to mention she had told Molly and the others to leave her alone. He sighed and cancelled the charm. _She'll be fine._ _I hope._

Hermione was anything but fine. As soon as she thought she had herself under control she thought about playing with Severus and began crying again. She wasn't upset with what happened, she realised. She was upset with her reaction to it. _What's wrong with me. Ron was right, I'm a freak._ She had enjoyed it. Far more than she thought she should have. Just thinking about it made her squirm and press her thighs together. What she really wanted was to do it again. _He did it to get you out of there alive. There's nothing more to it. He's hated you since first year. That's not about to change. _She had to remember it didn't mean anything to him. But she had enjoyed it so much. How was she ever going to find another man to do these things for her? And he had been so good at what he did. He had clearly done this before. She shuddered. _He told me right from the off that it was to get me out of there. Nothing more. But, how did he learn? _She frowned and shook herself a bit. _No matter. What's done is done. My first and last real BDSM experience. _Hermione pulled herself up off the floor and made her way to the bed. She fell onto it and into an exhausted sleep.

Severus couldn't sleep. His mind was racing. _She enjoyed it. Hell, _I _enjoyed it! I haven't had a willing partner in years. Enough. _He knew he would need to sleep some tonight. He and Hermione were going to have to talk eventually. _What do I tell her? The truth? Yes! _His mind screamed at him, _tell her the truth, you both enjoyed it. She's a beautiful woman, no longer your student, so what's wrong with exploring this? _"Oh, shut up!" He growled to no one. He forced his thoughts away and lay down, he fell into an uneasy sleep.

When Hermione woke the next morning she felt, well, like shite, if she were honest with herself. Her head ached and her eyes were itchy with tiredness. She knew she hadn't gotten enough sleep, but she didn't feel like laying there anymore. _Time to face the music._ She hauled herself out of bed and headed to the shower. A short time later, freshly showered and feeling a bit better, Hermione descended the stairs. She stopped outside the kitchen door, she could hear voices. Taking a few deep breaths she opened the door.

"Severus, what happened to the girl, she was distraught!" _She's no longer a girl, and you don't want to know what happened. _

"Molly, I told you last night, she will talk about it when she's ready." Severus answered her. _For heaven's sake woman, shut up!_

"Hmph, something obviously happened to upset her, I don't see why you won't tell me." Molly persisted.

"It's not my story to tell." Severus said through gritted teeth. _I wouldn't even know where to start. I hope she comes up with something convincing._ As if on cue, Hermione opened the door to the kitchen, looking less than pleased.

"Molly, all that matters, as I said last night, is that Severus got me out alive. Please let it go!" Hermione told the older witch firmly. But Molly would not be swayed.

"Hermione honey, you'll feel better if you talk about it. You were very upset last night-" Molly started, but Hermione cut her off.

"I had just been held in the Dark Lords headquarters, not knowing if I was going to live or die from one minute to the next, of course I was upset. I'm feeling much better now. Please Molly, I don't want to talk about it anymore." With that she sat down across from Severus, picked up the tea pot and made herself some tea. Luckily Molly dropped the subject at that point. Severus was ready to hex the woman. _Clearly she hasn't come up with a convincing lie yet. Not good. Something tells me Potter isn't going to let it go that easily. _

* * *

Once they had finished breakfast, Hermione and Severus, by unspoken agreement, left the kitchen and went to the drawing-room. Severus quickly silenced and warded the door. "Hermione, I think it's time we talk."

"I agree. Where the hell did you learn all that?" She blurted before she could stop herself. _Oops!_ Severus turned and gave her an odd look before dropping down into one of the arm chairs. Hermione followed his lead and took the one opposite him.

"Is that where you'd like to start?" Severus asked.

"I think it would be a good place, yes." She answered. So he launched into his story...

* * *

AN: Ooh, evil cliffie! :) Stay tuned!


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